Friday, February 14, 2003

hey alL!! HAPPY CNY!!

its d yr of d monkey, so guys, do take goOd care of ur banana & peaches before smth happens.. haha.. ok that was quite sick.. its taken frm an sms that ah-pek sent to claypot and ah-kor and i dunno who else.. haha..

this arvo went town w claypot and he bought a funky phOne.. the new panasonic X70.. bLardy cooL.. so much nicer den mine.. but i shaLL be contented w my phOne.. and take comfort in that my phone camera takes clearer pics den his.. MUaHAHA..

and i reaLised that giordano has new colours for their v-neck tops.. i am i big fan of those.. aLready haf 2 white ones, 2 black ones, 1 maroOn one, 1 red one.. den todaY i saw pink, baby bLue and yeLLow and green! i wanT! haha..

so anywayz, i had a funky reunion dinner at a funky revolving restaurant at harbourfront la. food was ok.. it tasted pretty good and it was filling.. i can't stand places that charges horrendous amounts of money for not so good food in pathetic quantities.. at 1st e spinning was ok.. lyk pretty cooL.. but if u focus on the turning, it can really get to u. so i avoided looking down at the floor, where u can see it lyk really turning.. but once it hit 10pm, my cousins and i realised that the blardy place was turning faster.. and it was really getting to us. d facT that we were feeLing fuLL didn't heLp. oh welL.. but on d whoLe, it was cooL. and the tcs actress lin xiang ping (yvonne lim i think) and her family was lyk one tabLe away frm us. haha.. she looks prettier in persOn den on tv man..

am wearing my new PJs now.. v comfy.. its d shirt kind can! i love those! haha..

on a less cheery note, i feeL lyk i've recently lost a friend. i understand how hard it is for ppl to remain frens after they've broken up.. but i've always believed it to be possibLe, esp if after a long time.. budden rite, for all d talk of being close frens and yada yada.. and after such a long time.. its lyk d frenship toOk a sudden turn and he became distaNt la.. sigh.. i'm not expecting anything frm him lo. i've long given up on salvaging it and i juz wanna be frens.. i juz can't help but feel a bit sad that he's so distant la. as tho he's perpetually hiding smth frm me, or that he's juz keeping me in touch juz to humour me or wad.. sigh.. men...... haha...
i'LL juz lean on my Lord Jesus continuaLLy.. He'll nv let me dOwn.. He loves me as i am.. and basicaLLy, HE ROCKS MY WORLD!!!! :D

so anywayz, hOpe u aLL haf a bLessed yr ahead!

"I can do aLL things thru CHRIST who strengthens me" Philippians 4:13

Tuesday, February 11, 2003

i finaLLy went to chinatoWn!

but kinda sad coz d henna tattOo i goT wasn't as nice as it shd be. sighz... oh but i did manage to get a nice pink shawL for onli $5.. cheap cheap.. :D
bLardy fast.. tmr is CNY eve liao.. sch has started for 3 weeks and i havent dOne anything soLid.. after CNY i muz reaLLy get dOwn to sTuff man..

so anywayz, was reading my honey hon's bLog and she has once again reminded of my HeavenLy Father's infinite love for ME and YOU and EVERYONE.. and i ask myseLf why do i aLLow myseLf to feeL so dejected / rejected sometimes?? it hurTs Him when i hurt.. simpLy coz He loves me so. and i shd, esp in d times of trial, STANDFAST in FAITH.. :D thanks again to my honey hOnz and aLL my darLing frens.. :)

anywayz, smth v interesting occurred to me today.. but not v convenient to post here.. cOz i reaLised my bLog is wideLy linked.. haha.. but i juz hafta say that smth occurred to me.. haha.. not exacTLy "occurred", but yah.. i reaLised smth la. haha... ... ... ... ... ... ... ...

so anywayz, hOpe u aLL wud bear in mind our Lord's all emcompassing love for YOU.. and i pray that you aLL wud haf a bLessed CNY :D

Sunday, February 09, 2003

all the fear has left me now

i'm not frightened anymore. it's my heart that pounds beneath my's my mouth that pushes out this breath and if i shed a tear i won't cage it. i won't fear love. and if i feel a rage i won't deny it. i won't fear love. companion to our demons they will dance and we will play. with chairs, candles and clothes, making darkness in the day. it will be easy to look in or out, upstream or down without a thought. and if i shed a tear i won't cage it, i won't fear love. and if i feel a rage i won't deny it. i won't fear love. peace in the struggle to find peace. comfort on the way to comfort and if i shed a tear i won't cage it. i won't fear love and if i feel a rage i won't deny it, i won't fear love. i won't fear love. i won't fear love.....

"fumbLing towaRds ecstasy" by sarah mcLachLan....

and cLaypoT beTter not get funny ideas abT d titLe..

me in in sch now.. in the central lib..

dis farking cold place.. trying to read abt honda (not the car-maker) toshiaki and the discovery of europe... or more generally, abt late tokugawa reformers. haha.. crappies.. but decided to go read the bloggies of my usuaL ppL and smth hit me la. so here i am blogging la.

anyway, i think that humans are reaLLy irritating and super one-kind la!! we can say one thing and do another. say one thing and feel another. wear a farking mask, and tell ppl tt we r wearing a farking mask. den wads e pt of wearing d mask? and i think its understood tt everyone wears a farking mask la.. who walks ard, exposed, open and vulnerable to all things? some things are better lefT unsaid.. but if we dun say, its as tho we dun care. but if we say it, den its as thO we r either (a) stating d obvious (b) trying to get attention (c) wadeva other reason the warped human mind can think of. haha. i'm not saying that i'm not guilty of it.. or haf nv been guilty of it.. i'm juz saying that...... oh well.. better not say.. scarly get slammed.. jOkes..

we are all God's creation.. surely we weren't made to be so perverse, depraved.... yada yada??? wad d fark happened to us????? sigh....

oh i juz wanna show appreciation for those who haf been dere w me, for me, and stiLL are. u guys know who u r.. :D God bLess..

i love my red hair. its so me.

and its farking coLd here la.. and i haf SW1101E lecture at 4pm.. sianz..

and i need a man.. but i dun want one. haha. doubLe jOkes. oh welL..

back to honda toshiaki... den SW1101E...

i need to get my readings.. readings... readings...............................................